July 2003

Ideas will only get you so far these days. Count on personal relationships to carry you farther. The new economy is not just about

the exchange of information. It's about the exchange of

relationships.

 

~~Pam Alexander, CEO, Alexander Ogilvy Public Relations

Have you heard the statement, "It's not what you know, it's who you know"?  Although this is an age-old statement, it still rings true today.   Our lives are so full that the only way to get more out of them is through OPE (Other People's Energy).  Whether we are speaking of business needs or personal efforts, receiving/accepting assistance from our network of influence allows us to live lives much grander and more successful than if we operate as a Lone Ranger..

It's lonely at the top if you have created a life and business solely dependent on you.  Maximizing your time and success is dependant on having a network of influence that supports you.  What relationships do you have, which if cultivated ever so slightly, would turn into referrals for your business?  Which relationships do you have, which if cultivated, could turn to trade situations whereby you trade your talents for theirs?  This is called networking.  In business, we often think of networking is a planned activity.  I'd suggest you begin to look at networking as a daily activity and a large part of your life... make it spontaneous and fun and do it all the time.  Having natural conversations with others can indeed turn into referrals.

Here are some suggestion for you on networking with ease:

1)  Be comfortable when you speak about your needs.

This does not mean that you plead with people.  I'm definitely not speaking here about being 'needy'.  We all have needs for many things.  Speaking about them and writing them down as goals is what makes them a reality.  Needs are a very normal part of life.  For example, I had a need for a handyman to fix things around my home.  I asked friends and family if they knew of anyone who could do some of these projects for me.  I received a name and phone number and contacted that person, and the conversation led to the fact that we could trade services as well as give referrals to each other.  We have each received value and continue to receive value..... all it took was a conversation with a friend.

2) Speak about your business in a "heart-centered" way.

Speaking from the heart is so natural, yet we are taught to do just the opposite.  Society teaches us to plan our thoughts and actions--to map it all out.  I'm not indicating that this is not useful sometimes and perhaps initially, you may need to map out some of your thoughts in order to get clear on your direction.  Once you identify with your passion though, let it shine.  Tell others about it in a way that draws them in.  This is called attraction and attraction is clearly an inside (heart) job.

3)  Go with the flow of the conversation.

Remember this version of the 80/20 rule.  80% they talk, 20% you talk.  If you've created a standard statement (elevator speech) for your business, learn to flex it when you need to.  Flexibility is power!!  Let's add another colloquialism here:  they don't care how much you know until they know how much you care.  People want to be heard.  Listen to their needs and they will listen to yours AND be doubly supportive.

4)  Reciprocity works every time.

This is called 'Givers Gain.'  Give first... by offering a suggestion, giving a referral, listening to them talk about what they are looking for.  Truly Listening in and of itself is a gift for many people.  When we are given a gift, there is a mechanism within us which makes us want to give something back.  It's an automatic human reaction for most of us.

5)  We all touch 250 people daily at a minimum.

When you are thinking about the people you know, don't just focus on your clients, friends and family.  Remember that each of the people you know has a network of clients, friends and family.... ask for what you need and invite them to think of who they know, etc.

6)  Be as clear as possible when asking for your referrals.

Please remember that the meaning you give to words may not be the same meaning others have for the same words.  When you are asking for something, remember to be clear about what you need.  Ambiguous requests may be interpreted as uncertainty on  your part and thus cause the person you are speaking with to feel uncomfortable giving you a referral.  Your network wants to know that you will treat the people they refer to you with respect and that you will honor their time and efforts.

7)  Networking is possible 24/7.

I'm not suggesting you be working or focused on business 24/7.  I am suggesting that if you live your life from you heart you will be your true self all the time.  This will make you passionate and attractive to others AND others will want to give all the assistance you need to get things done.  Whether you are in the grocery store or on a Board of Directors for your favorite charity, be real!  You'll then discoverthat obtaining OPE will be a no- brainer for you.  It's only lonely at the top if you want it to be.  Bottom line, get out there and talk to people....the rest is a piece of cake!

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